Mini Magic Celebrity Commercial – The Real Ladies Demon

Editor’s Note: Just the ad this time. So we don’t break up the pace of this commercial, it’s going to be the dialogue only. This card was spoiled by WotC employee Monty Ashley.

Hello baby, how are you doing? Why yes, I think it’s completely appropriate for me to be shirtless. After all, how can I show off my manly chest hair? I know you like to run your hands through it.

Ah, so you noticed my wingspan. Pretty impressive, right? How many of those Angels  you know have a wingspan like this? And all they have are feathers, always molting and messing up the place. Mine? Leathery skin.

That smell? Pure sulfur. From the bowels of Hell, where I just craved out from. While I know it’s not the rich mahogany leather bound book smell you’re more likely used to, you’d be surprised; sulfur is a complete aphrodisiac. Then again, I’m me, so you really don’t need the smell to be drawn to me.

You want to know about the pile of dead bodies I’m resting upon? Baby, I did that for you, so you’d know I’d do anything and everything for you. That guy over there, the disemboweled one, no other other disemboweled one, he was staring at you all night. Seemed like a creep, a real stalker. Mutilations, beheadings, anything you want, I can do.

What? Alright, I understand. Not like you’re the only girl at the bar here tonight anyway. Man, why can I ever find the right girl for me?

(Voice Over) Match.com, where we find your soulmate. Come try our 27 point test today free for a month. Match.com, because picking up single ladies in a bar when you’re a hellspawn is hard enough.

Mini Magic Celebrity Commercial – Manliest Ad Ever

Editor’s Note: Just the ad this time. So we don’t break up the pace of this commercial, it’s going to be the dialogue only. If you don’t get this, there is the corresponding commercial after the ad. This card was spoiled by WotC employee Mike Turian.

Hello, Mages. Look at your Planeswalker, and now back to me. Now back at your Planeswalker, and now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if you stop using White Weenie decks and switch to Green Mana, he could attack like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on Zendikar with the Beastbreaker your Planeswalker could attack like. What’s in your hand? Back at me. I have an Rise of the Eldrazi booster pack with two cards for that deck you love. Look at it again, the cards are now moxes. Anything is possible when your Planeswalker attacks with Green Mana and not a goblin. I’m on a beast. (Whistle tune)

Twitter Game #1: Caption This Image

What would you caption this image?

This is what happens when you don’t follow me on Twitter (@mtgcolorpie), you miss out fantastic contests and games. Sure, there have been better contests on twitter such as ManaNation’s win Revised and Legend’s packs and GGSLive’s contest which has been going on for about 20 weeks (is that thing finally over?). But with this game, it’s all in good fun and coming up with something creative (Aww, isn’t it cute, the little Magic blog is trying to compete with the big boys).

I’ve taken an image which seems to be a “confirmed” (by non-WotC sources, but said they got it from Wizards) for the new set Rise of the Eldrazi. All I asked you to do was to tweet me (or use the #TGotD tag for Twitter Game of the Day) a caption of the image and if you win, you get a signed card by me.

See, in MaRo’s twitter contests you don’t win anything.

Me: 1, Rosewater: 0.

What? They’re challenges? Whatever. I’m putting my own cards on the line here.

Normally I wouldn’t do a blog post on this, but I wanted to share with everyone the great answers I received for this contest. If you guys liked this, then I’ll gladly do more. What’s funny about this is that people saw different things in the image; it’s like a Rorschach test. Some people saw a mushroom, others a crab, and others some very strange things. And now, the captions:

Crabs Category:

cikesef: we have finally found it, men! AT LAST, A GIANT ENEMY CRAB!

manashark: “how many cards will that crab mill?”

Continue reading “Twitter Game #1: Caption This Image”